FBS Mission Statement:

We at FBS believe that offensive coordinator Bryan Stinespring bears the largest share of the blame for years of sub-par output from some of the most talented players ever to set foot on Worsham Field. We believe the main objective of the VT football program - a national championship - will escape us as long as Stinespring is making the calls. We therefore advocate the improvement of our football program through the replacement of our offensive coordinator.

Tuesday, November 30, 2010


The conference has released its All ACC roster, and VT put more players on the first and second team than any other program since conference expansion. Eleven Hokies in all landed on the list, with three on the first team and eight on the second. Running down the list, Virginia Tech has:

  • First team All ACC quarterback Tyrod Taylor
  • First team All ACC cornerback Jayron Hozley
  • First team All ACC kicker Chris Hazley
Each one of those was a no brainer, really.  Russell Wilson of NC state came within two votes of the first team, but his interception spree in the second half of the season and his team's collapse against Maryland to piss away the Atlantic division title relegate the Wolfpack QB to the second string. The only other ACC quarterback who might have been able to challenge Tyrod with the year he had would have been FSU QB Christian Ponder, whose season got somewhat derailed by a bursa sack injury early in the season.

The Hokies' second teamers are heavily dominated by offensive and defensive line players: Jaymes Brooks, BDC, Steven "Sergeant" Friday, and John "Send You to Your" Graves. That just shows how far both lines have come since Boise State in Landover. Senior Davon Morgan got a nod, which is good to see for a guy who patiently waited his turn in the defense. Punter Brian Saunders made the second team. So did Bruce Taylor, who has proven himself to be the next great Hokies linebacker. And rounding out the second team is David Wilson, who got the nod as a kick returner. Which brings up the most surprising thing about this list...

None of VT's tailbacks made the All ACC team. Three backs, all of whom will take handoffs on Sundays after their days at VT are over, and not one of them got even an honorable mention. Now with Ryan Williams it's understandable, what with his slow start and lingering hamstring issues. But apparently Darren Evans and David Wilson having to split carries for most of the season was too big an obstacle for either of them to put together an all-conference type of season.

Regardless, I've said since the spring game that this was the most talented offense VT has ever fielded and it's looking like this is some serious vindication for that belief. But what else can you expect when you have the 20th best offensive coordinator in the nation?

Sunday, November 28, 2010

I Think The Turkey's Tryptophan And Bud Light Are Affecting My Eyesight.

So it's Sunday night, after Thanksgiving. There's still mainly turkey, potatoes, and gravy flowing in my veins from basically 9 straight meals of it. I popped a couple post-drive-back-from-Blacksburg-Bud Lights to watch San Diego nearly make Peyton Manning cry tonight, flipping back and forth to watch our men's basketball team fall to UNLV in the 76 Tournament final.

But I think the Thanksgiving food overload, combined with those "couple" Sunday night Bud Lights, are drastically affecting my eyesight and my ability to coherently read the English language.

Props to DicTailgate first, as I found the link on his site. But, being that the article in question that he linked to is about the namesake of this website - I had to post it here too.

Click here and be astonished. Be amazed. You might vomit a little bit.

Tyrod Taylor: Your all-time everything leader.

Tyrod Taylor passed for 176 yards against the Wahoos, giving him 6,532 passing yards in his career and moving him into first place in career passing yardage at VT. We're to the point now where it's a stretch to find records that Tyrod doesn't own, but with two games left to go here's where Tyrod stands:

  • With 3 more TD passes Tyrod will break the single season passing TD record currently owned by Maruice DeShazo.
  • Tyrod will not break the career passing TD record. He currently has 40, and Bryan Randall holds the record with 48.
  • If he completes 34 more passes he'll own the all-time pass completions record.
  • There's some confusion on this one: Lee Suggs owns the single season TD record at VT with 28. Tyrod has thrown for 20 TDs and run for four more this season. I'd think if he runs or throws for 5 more he'd own that record, but I'm not sure passing TDs count toward that record.
Tyrod Taylor, you have MOXY.

Since we're talking records here, Chris Hazley already owns the record for most consecutive field goals in a season with 19. If he hits his next four attempts he'll also own the record for consecutive FGs in a career. If he hits five more attemps this season he'll own the record for FGs made in a season. Another five total points gets him the single season scoring record for a kicker. After that wounded duck of a kick he opened his career with against Boise State, I find all of the above genuinely shocking.

Saturday, November 27, 2010

Open Thread - Virginia

Post thoughts and opinions here.

Thursday, November 25, 2010

Games to Watch - Week 13

Virginia Tech vs Virginia
Saturday, November 27
12:00 Noon, ACC Network (Raycom)
It's come down to this. No team has been perfect in ACC play since expansion. VT hasn't survived a conference slate unscathed since 1999, and has accomplished the feat only that one time. To say that this team stands at the threshold of history... well, if I said that I'd sound like a douchebag. So let's just say it'd be a hell of a thing. And there would be no greater turd in the punch bowl that to fuck that up against UVA of all teams.

Saturday is Senior Day, and on this particular Senior Day more than any other I will find myself wondering where the hell the past four years went. It doesn't seem like four years ago since we saw Tyrod Taylor strap on his helmet on the LSU sideline. But Saturday will be T-Mobile's final game at Lane Stadium. Tyrod already owns three quarters of the VT record book, but if he manages to throw for 153 yards he'll break the all time career passing record at Tech. If he throws four touchdown passes (not bloody likely, I'll admit) he'll claim the single season passing TD record. In other words, Saturday could be huge for Tyrod.

Saturday will be day 2,191 of Virginia Tech's continuous possession of the Commonwealth Cup.

PREDICTION: Virginia Tech 42, Virginia 17

Friday, November 26
The Whole Damn Day

Yes. The whole damn day.

I can't recall a day of college football that has so much potential to derail the entire BCS championship chase like this one. 

First we get the Iron Bowl at 2:30 on CBS, in which Auburn faces its toughest test of the season hands down in Alabama. The Menstrual Tide has had a bit of a disappointing season with two conference losses and no chance to repeat as SEC champs, let alone BCS champions. But laying the smack down on their in-state rivals would go a long way toward washing to bad taste out of their mouths.

Next we head to Arizona/Oregon at 7:00 on ESPN. The Wildcats have three PAC10 losses and are well out of the race for the Rose Bowl, but they sport the nation's 12th best scoring defense and know how to give the Ducks fits. It took two overtimes for Oregon to put Arizona away last season, and you know the Wildcats' co-defensive coordinators Greg Brown and Tim Kish have been dissecting the film from the Oregon/Cal game to discern how to stop the Ducks' offensive onslaught.  And unlike Cal, if the Arizona D manages to stall the Ducks, the Wildcat O is good enough to actually win the game for them.

And finally we wrap up the day on ESPN with Boise State's final legitimate obstacle to an undefeated season. Nevada has no defense, so forget about trying to stop the Broncos. This will likely be a shootout (quite appropriate with Nevada's pistol offense), and the first offense to make a significant mistake or give the ball away will very likely lose it for their team. Add to the pressure on Boise State the fact that by the time they take the field in Reno they will already know if one or two of the teams ahead of them in the BCS rankings have fallen.

If one of these teams lose on Friday things will get interesting. If two or all three go down we instantly shoot to DEFCON 5.

PREDICTION: Armageddon

NC State vs Maryland
Saturday, November 27
3:30 PM, ESPN
This game would be a lot more intriguing if Maryland hadn't shit the bed against Florida State. As it stands, only the Wolfpack can walk out of this game Charlotte bound. A Maryland win would send Florida State to its first ACC championship game since 2005. 

But don't look for this game to be decided early just because one of the two teams doesn't have much to play for. The all time record between the Wolfpack and Terps is 31-31-4 and the game has been decided by more than ten points once in the last decade. 

This game will come down to how well NC State - traditionally an afterthought in the ACC race - rises to the occasion, which has been a recurring theme all season. Last week Tom O'Brien's team downed the Tarholes to remain in contention. Does the Wolfpack have one more clutch performance left in them, or will we see the spectacular faceplant at the finish line we've become accustomed to seeing from NC State and Tom O'Brien?

PREDICTION: NC State 38, Maryland 34

Saturday, November 27

Joining the ACC has been the best thing to happen to Virginia Tech football since Michael Boddie penetrated Brenda Vick. You probably haven't heard that Virginia Tech has won ten or more games each season since joining the ACC. Because nobody talks about our streak of ten win seasons. Especially nobody on the coaching staff, and most certainly not as some lame argument to excuse a lack of performance at the offensive coordinator position. But well beyond everybody's favorite coachspeak excuse, the ACC has bestowed Virginia Tech with a lot of hardware. Three Coastal Division championships. Three ACC Championships. And the only BCS bowl win by an ACC team since expansion. 

But you have to call a spade a spade. Virginia Tech has been football overlords in a basketball conference. The ACC is a solid fifth out of the six BCS conferences, and John Swofford gives thanks every day for the Big East. 

Rivalry Saturday is traditionally an annual reaffirmation of the pecking order of college football, with ACC teams taking it on the chin from their in state SEC counterparts (not a boxing metaphor). There are four ACC/SEC matchups this weeks: Florida/FSU, Georgia/Georgia Tech, Clemson/South Carolina, and Wake Forest/Vanderbilt. Nobody give a flying fuck about Wake Forest/Vanderbilt. We're going to pretend it doesn't exist. 

But if the ACC were to come away with two or - God forbid - three wins in the games that people will actually pay attention to it would help salvage the reputation of the redheaded stepchild of southern football. We all know the national sports media would spin it as the SEC being down instead of the ACC being up, but let's be honest - wouldn't it be fun to watch SEC fans squirm?


Tuesday, November 23, 2010

Redskins Sign Macho Harris

A quick Virginia Tech football alumni update, considering Hokie fans seem to intersect with Skins fans a lot: the Redskins signed former Virginia Tech star Macho Harris today. He was drafted by the Eagles last year but was cut after training camp this year. If you're a Hokie who happens to be a Redskins fan as well, you can look forward to rooting for Macho Harris again.

Saturday, November 20, 2010

Open Thread - Miami

Post thoughts and opinions here.

Wednesday, November 17, 2010

Games to Watch - Week 12 (The Road to Charlotte Edition)

Virginia Tech vs Miami
3:30 PM, ESPN

Win and we're in.

I want to expound upon something I mentioned in my summary of the UNC game. Frank Beamer and the Hokies have the opportunity to do something that no team in the ACC has done since expansion: go undefeated in conference play. No ACC team has been perfect in conference since Florida State in 2000, and Virginia tech hasn't managed to go undefeated in conference play since 1999 (while still in the Big East.) An 8-0 record in ACC play would make for an excellent sorbet to cleanse the palate of the the shit sundae that was the first two weeks of this season. But there is one holy hell of an obstacle in our way.

Miami's defense is ranked 3rd in pass defense, 3rd in tackles for loss, and 8th in sacks. This is probably the best defense the Hokies have lined up against all season. The only chink in their armor is defending the run, giving up over 166 yards per game. Of course, to exploit that a team would need running backs. So far we don't know David's Wilson's status. We do, unfortunately, know Tony Gregory's: out for the season with an ACL tear. Ryan Williams looked good for the most part against UNC, but he had enough slips and falls to prompt Frank Beamer to ask Billy Hite if he was wearing the same cleats as everyone else. That might be a result of RMFW not wanting to plant hard with his injured hamstring to make cuts. So of our four tailbacks, one is out, one is questionable, and one is doing his best Gerald Ford impression. That leaves Darren Evans. So, yeah, we're good. Hopefully Stiney will completely reverse track on his game plan in Chapel Hill and open up against the Canes with a ground attack that forces a seventh and eighth defender into the box. That may be the only way to get Tyrod going in the passing game, especially if Stiney still insists on sending all the receivers on 30 yard routes with no check downs. 

This one figures to be a low scoring slugfest with the 15th and 19th scoring defenses doing everything they can to lock the other team down. The difference, of course, is that Miami is facing the highest scoring offense they've face since Ohio State and the top scoring offense in the ACC.

Okay, hold up. Read that again. Ten games into the season Virginia Tech has the highest scoring offense in the conference. Tyrod Taylor, you are a goddam miracle worker.

PREDICTION: Virginia Tech 19, Miami 14

NC State vs UNC
12:00 Noon, ACC Network (Raycom)

The biggest question in this game is will anyone be in the stands now that college basketball season has started?

NC State currently controls its destiny in the Atlantic. The Wolfpack is even in the loss column with FSU and Maryland but owns the tiebreaker with FSU and will face Maryland next week. And yet if NC State drops this one to the Tarholes and Florida State goes on to beat Maryland then the Wolfpack will find themselves in their familiar role of ACC also ran.

I see this game as a question of motivation. The motivation for NC State is obvious. For UNC it becomes a question of is it enough to play for pride in a season that had such high expectations derailed by scandal and suspensions. The Tarholes are eliminated from championship contention. Their quarterback just doubled his season interceptions in one game. And I assure you nobody in Chapel Hill gives a shit about UNC football now that there's hoops on.

But the Wolfpack has been mediocre since collapsing against the Hokies in week five, going 3-2 with losses to ECU and Clemson. Russel Wilson started the year looking like a dark horse Heisman contender but has thrown as many picks as TDs (11) over the last six games. And Tom O'Brien has a long history of never quite being able to get over the hump. But NC State has won the last three against the Tarholes, and they still have something to play for.


Florida State vs Maryland
8:00 PM, ABC Regional

I really suck at tiebreaker logic, but if I'm thinking this through correctly then this is an elimination game for both these teams regardless of what NC State does against UNC. Meanwhile, like I said above, if FSU wins this one and NC State loses to the Tarholes then FSU punches its ticket to Charlotte. 

God I love late season college football.

This one is a story of two resurrections. On one hand Florida State has been trying for a decade to get back into the company of elite programs, getting so desperate that they elbowed aside the man who built their program from scratch in the hopes that their OC could do a better job. On the other hand, Ralph Friedgen is just trying to save his job after the Maryland AD basically had to accept that Fridge was just too expensive to fire last season. Now the Terps are two wins away from the most improbable turnaround in college football this season.

PREDICTION: FSU 34, Maryland 24

Tuesday, November 16, 2010

We interrupt this football season to bring you basketball.

In just under five hours the Virginia Tech men's basketball team plays a monster of a non-conference game, taking on the #3 Kansas State Wildcats in Manhattan, Kansas. A win would be huge. Like Ralph Friedgen before gastric bypass surgery huge. The problem is Kansas State's players are all like seven foot ten, on average. The Hokies are going to have a massive size disadvantage, which will make rebounding a wee bit difficult. If VT is going to pull this one off they need an abundance of good mojo from Hokie Nation.

So please, support our beloved Uncle Fester.

Hey you! Watch the damn game!

Go Hokies.

Sunday, November 14, 2010

Highlight of the Game

Ripped 'em a new tar hole

One word: KANSAS.

That's what this game felt like to me, on offense at least. To be fair, I came into this game having had nothing to really crucify Stiney over for the past five weeks. But sweet cheebus the playcalling was atrocious in this one. Stiney opened the game with a pass at all costs attitude that wrecked Tyrod's completion percentage (13 of 28). Part of that was a frustratingly high number of drops, the worst of which ricocheted off Jarret Boykin's gargantuan hands at the UNC five yard line. But give most of the credit to UNC's defensive coordinator. It was obvious from the start that the Tarholes had studied Tyrod's interception in the end zone against GT last week and based their entire pass defense around it. They constantly had four D linemen playing zone contain, dropping seven into coverage to blanket our receivers - who of course were all running deep routes. 

Opposing defenses should know by now that the one thing Tyrod is lacking as a passer is an internal clock that tells him it's time to throw the ball away. That's not a knock on Tyrod, because the scramble drill that he and his receivers have going has worked some miracles through the last four years. (See Dyrell Robert's touchdown reception against Nebraska last year.) But the scramble drill is also only as good as the variety of routes being run before the receivers start scrambling. If all our receivers are running deep outs, posts, or go routes, with nothing over the middle and no check downs, then by the time they start to scramble they've all converged on the same location on the field - meaning the opposing team's secondary has converged there too.

And yet we kept trying to establish the pass as our primary offense, even when Darren Evans and Ryan Williams were both primed for big days. As Billy pointed out on the open thread, RMFW was averaging 9.7 yards per touch through his first six carries. Evans was trucking people on every play. Three different times in the first half I literally screamed, "Halfback draw!" to my television because the way the Tarhole D was set up it would have gotten at least ten yards. In classic fashion, however, Stiney didn't lean heavily on the run until it was time to kill the clock, and then it was runs up the gut for minimal gain. 

But hey, we still won by 16 and exacted some small semblance of revenge over last year's heartbreaker. I hate to admit it, but there was a part of me deep down inside that squealed like a little girl when the Hyphen cause Anthony Elzy to fumble the ball away in the red zone. Later when the camera cut to him crying on the bench my wife, god love her, said, "Aw, that's sad." She didn't think it was funny at all when I laughed.

I wonder what she would have thought had I told her what I really wanted to do was taste the sweet, sweet tears of his sorrow like Cartman did when he tricked that kid into eating his own parents in the chili cookoff.

I digress.

Our secondary... wow. Just... wow. As may interceptions in one game as TJ Yates had thrown so far all season. Torrian Gray is proving himself to be the best secondary coach in the nation and has a bright future ahead of him as the future defensive coordinator for the Virginia Tech Hokies. After shitting the bed on the first series this defense suddenly became very fun to watch.

And Bruce Taylor. Nothing else. Just Bruce Taylor.

Now it's win and we're in. We just need to pick up one of the next two to book our trip to Charlotte. But we also have a legitimate shot to do something that VT has never accomplished - in fact, something that no team has accomplished since ACC expansion: go undefeated in conference play.

Two stops left in the 2010 Redemption Tour. Next up is Miami. Which is not, contrary to popular opinion, back. Initial reports are saying Jacory Harris will be back under center for the game. This Jacory Harris:

Let's do this thing.

Saturday, November 13, 2010

Open Thread - UNC

Post thoughts and opinions here

Wednesday, November 10, 2010

Games to Watch - Week 11

Virginia Tech vs North Carolina
3:30 PM, ABC/ESPN Reverse Mirror

So turns out the only thing that might be capable of catching David Wilson certainly isn't the Georgia Tech kickoff coverage team, but might just be a virus. The Washington Post is reporting that David Wilson might potentially be held out of practice all week and is listed as day to day with what trainer Mike Goforth describes as "just a typical virus, nothing major for us to expect anything more than that." Oh, well good.

Psssst. It's Mono.

So the Truth is benched and that means the carries against UNC to be divvied up between Evans and Williams. Let's just hope Evans and Coach Hite don't randomly assume Williams has taken himself out of the game again.

All season the assumption has been that UNC would have all its suspended players back against VT just because, y'know, that's sort of how Hokie luck runs sometimes. But in actuality the Tarholes are still far from a complete unit. (Heh heh, I said unit.) Of the 14 names that started the season under scrutiny by the NCAA, six have been cleared to play. Two remain in eligibility limbo and six are confirmed out for the season. Those whose seasons are done include defensive tackle Marvin Austin, who was to be the anchor of their defense, and receiver Greg Little. So the 'Holes will still be without some of their biggest names Saturday.

Considering Butch Davis has had to make due with what players he's had available the Tarholes have managed to put together a pretty impressive showing this season. They're averaging an anemic 383 yards per game, but that stat is dragged down by their lack of a running game. UNC started the season down two running backs due to the NCAA investigation. Those two backs have since been reinstated, but now Davis has lost leading rusher Johnny White to a broken collarbone. But the Heels get it done through the air, with TJ Yates sporting a passer rating of 154.4 which is good for second in the ACC.

With Wilson potentially out for the UNC game the status of Ryan William's hamstring becomes of paramount importance. Not that Evans is incapable of carrying the entire load at the tailback position. DE has proven that he is back and better than ever, running with power and authority for a 5.6 ypc average. But Evans is a bruiser back. He will run through you. Williams would add a shiftiness to the running game that would frustrate and confuse defenders who have been trying to bring down Evans on power alone. By Williams' own admission, though, the hammy is not completely healed, and he knows better than anyone what he's capable of doing. If he finds that he just can't go against the Tarholes then Darren Evans will have to carry the load. And believe me, I'm fine with that.

Oh, and Chris Drager is out. Probably a concussion but Beamer's not tipping his cards. 

But the real bollocks is that Dyrell Roberts is gone for the season with compartment syndrome in his thigh due to a hard hit against GT. This leaves Tyrod without a legitimate third receiver. Marcus Davis was supposed to have a breakout year, but so far I've seen nothing out of him that makes me think that he's got a bright future at wide receiver. He's a beast physically, but he's been dropping balls like he's play beer pong all season. And Xavier Boyce... seriously, is Xavier Boyce still on the fucking team? Has anyone heard from him? Should we be concerned?

All that said, we still win Saturday. Why? Because Ryan Williams still remembers the fumble from last year, because Tyrod is Jesus, and because Butch Davis is Frank Beamer's bitch.

PREDICTION: Virginia Tech 31, UNC 27

Friday, November 5, 2010

David Wilson, you, sir, have moxy. (And Mono)

Thursday, November 4, 2010

Open Thread - Georgia Tech

Posts thoughts and opinions here.

Tuesday, November 2, 2010

Game to Watch - Week 10

Fuck every other game this week.

This week it's not about rankings, conference position, BCS style points, or anything else. This week it's about pure, unadulterated, unbridled hate. The Yellow Jackets come into Lane Stadium, and greeting them will the approximately 67,000 thoroughly pissed off Hokies. 

Anyone forget about this from last year's game?

Or this?

Or Paul Johnson's classy response to being called out on his illegal blocking schemes to the league?

"They got out-schemed. So, it's illegal to out-scheme them, I guess."

Paul Johnson is a liar, a cheat, and an all around douchebag.

Now on to the actual game itself. This is not last year's ACC champion Georgia Tech squad. Make no mistake, the Jackets still boast the nation's top rushing offense, running for over 317 yards per game. But the only team in 1A football that throws it less that GT is Army. This season Paul Johnson is missing the flex part of his flexbone offense, and the results are two conference losses as we open November. Still, with our woes at linebacker Georgia Tech might not need to throw a single pass. Making things worse is the fact that Bruce Taylor, the lone standout in the linebacking corps this year, is hobbled with a high ankle sprain. Word from Taylor himself is that he can run north/south without problems, but lateral movement - which is essential to stopping any sort of option offense - is sketchy at best. That means that redshirt freshman and former walk on Jack Tyler might be seeing a lot of playing time. Bud Foster is high on Tyler, but Tyler hasn't seen the field much this season because Foster isn't convinced he's up to speed on pass coverage. In other words, if there was a game for Tyler to get meaningful playing time with a chance to have a monster break out game, it would be against the option attack of Georgia Tech.

The Jackets have also been poor at defending the rush (which is odd, since that's basically all that defense sees in practice) giving up more than 162 rushing yards per game. That's counterbalanced by a surprisingly decent pass defense that's only giving up 192 passing yards per game. Part of that, however, is who they've played. The Yellow Jacket D gave up 368 yards through the air to NC State at home, which means their secondary is suspect. If Stinespring can use his trio of stud tailbacks to exploit GT's woes in defending the rush, thereby setting up the pass nicely for Tyrod, then it could be a long day for the Jackets.

And look, let's be honest. Their defensive coordinator is Al Groh. Okay?

The question, as always, is can VT stop the flexbone? The past two seasons Bud Foster has had no answers. And that's a painful sentence to write. Last year the burden of bottling up Josh Nesbitt fell on the shoulders of Kam Chancellor. One set of halftime adjustments later and it suddenly looks like not such a great idea to base your defensive scheme around one player. And really, this season there is no standout defender to base it around, anyway. While it might sound unconventional, I personally think our best shot of shutting down the flexbone might be the nickel package. An extra defensive back against an option offense, you ask? Well, when the alternative if Gouvia-Winslow, I'd prefer to have Morgan, Rock, Exum, Fuller, and Hosely on the field in man coverage. Granted, a 5'10" corner isn't bringing Josh Nesbitt down on his own, but I prefer the athletic ability of our corners and safeties to swarm to the ball and gang tackle. I also think our secondary is much further ahead in their development than all our linebackers not named Bruce Taylor.

Regardless of how our defense schemes to stop GT, I have one plea for Frank Beamer and Bryan Stinespring. Say what you will about them, our coaches are classy. Perhaps to a fault. Over the past four weeks we have watched a Hokie offense that, when it gets rolling, can score seemingly at will. Over the past four weeks we've also watched Beamer call off the dogs to avoid embarrassing the other team.

This week my request is simply this: Don't. If you can drop a hundred on Johnson and his squad, then try to drop a buck and a quarter on 'em. If given the opportunity, decline to take your foot off the gas. Or their necks.

We've been waiting a year for this. If you have the choice, please make it a show worth watching.

PREDICTION: Virginia Tech 42, Georgia Tech 31.

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